Monday, June 12, 2006

What's in a Name

Flatman and Iron Benny both have new bikes (well, Benny has a new bike, Flatman has some parts of a soon to be new bike). Flatman is still trying to determine the gender of his bike (he said, "Sex is yet to be determined..." but I hope he meant gender). Iron Benny didn't comment on gender, but has yet to name his bike.

Many of the other triathletes whose blogs are listed on this site have bikes with names. It seems the name helps embody the bike's soul. Perhaps, just perhaps, it keeps the bike happy. It at least helps with personality, as they can refer to their bike as a person, sometimes leaving visitors unsure about just whom they are talking. "Just who is this Carmen Tequilo that TriGreyhound seems so fond of mounting? Does his wife of 13 years know?"

Therein lies my dilemma. There is a new bike in my life. It is even an entire bike. It isn't merely a frame with the potential to become a bike. Born more than a week ago, the gender has yet to be determined, much less giving it a name. (I should point out here that my son was nearly 36 hours old before he had a name). Until I get some pictures posted, go here to see pictures.

It might be mere coincidence that since picking the bike up I have had two separate instances requiring extensive walking. The first was the semi-famous chain break incident. The second was a flat tire we aren't discussing, mostly because it was really my own fault. Perhaps it is really the bike trying to tell me something. "I need a name (snap)." Followed shortly by, "Hey, didn't you catch the hint? I still need a name (hissssss)!"

Mrs. Pol has provided what she refers to as "helpful suggestions." I, however, don't see the same humor she sees in "The Short Bus" (I think it's a frame of reference issue). "Yellow Submarine" is just a little to indicative of my swimming, and it really is best to stay on TOP of the water, preferably without the bike. And her suggestions go downhill from there.

The real question is this. Am I tempting fate if I don't name the bike? Will the triathlon bike gods rain terror down upon my head, plaguing me with still more catastrophic failures in the future? Would investment in kevlar bike shorts and jerseys be a solid choice? Or is there sufficient anecdotal data to support the unnamed bike?

So, a little RBF help is needed. Are there any suggestions for a suitable, perhaps fear-invoking, name? All suggestions (at least those more serious than Mrs. Pol's) will be considered. And while I don't have a big prize package for anyone providing the perfect name, you could live with the never-ending knowledge that you helped name the bike.

7 comments:

Nancy Toby said...

That's MY BIKE! I call her Buttercup. As in the Powerpuff girl. Or as in "Suck it up, Buttercup".

YMMV, however.

Deb said...

Ben & Jerry flavors are always good...maybe The Yellowjacket, you know.....fast..can come out of no where & sting you. I'm might be joining Mrs Pol soon! ;)

tri-mama said...

First, excellent work in the 10K-good job to Toddler as well (better start that race fee account now :) I love the feeling of a PR. As far as naming a bike goes, I named mine but feel a little sqeumish using the name. I think I loaded the name with too much personal thought, so using the name makes me feel like I'm biking in my birthday suit. So, if I call it anything, I call it bubble bike (it's got bubbles in the paint job). I love my bike, I love biking-but I like going with a generic name-unless something strikes you- like the USS Iron Toddler

Iron Pol said...

Thanks for the ideas to date. I had considered Sting, along the same lines as Yellowjacket (as well as showing my Tolkien geek side). I like the idea of the "ship" name, though it strikes a bit close to my 10 years in the Navy.

Perhaps "Baby Stepper" as a tribute to both my kids and the long process toward Ironman distance. Plus, when the bike has problems, it could be referred to as the "BS bike."

greyhound said...

Carmen named herself. With a surname like Tequilo, she was obviously a Latina. Just as obviously, the archetypal Latina vamp is Carmen.

Unless yours gets a new color, the yellow/gold shiny character is too obvious to pass up.

If she's elvish, maybe she is Galadriel.

Anonymous said...

Humm...
How about The Golden Girl (if you need a female name so you can make funny jokes about yourself and the Golden Girl) or The Banana (it's yellow and all endurance athletes eat bananas. Plus, I know a cheer from my youth softball days when our team was yellow that goes like this "Peel bananas, peel, peel bananas. Eat bananas, eat, eat bananas. B A N A N A S! Go BANANAS!" - notice the double meaning in "go bananas").

Lisa said...

I haven't named my bike either. It's a nice shade of teal, but I'm not so creative with the naming. I've had her (?) over a year. I guess I just assume it's a girl, because, well, boys drive me crazy, and she brings me happiness.

Good luck with the name search. :) And if you have ideas for me, please share. :)